The last 3 months have been a crazy mix of excitement, sometimes worry, and generally figuring out the million things we need to do. So I’m going to do an honest account of things from my POV, so some posts may have things you consider TMI. But overall if you aren’t super sensitive, it’s fine.
I realized pretty early on that there are lots of things I did not know about pregnancy. One of the big things what that all that’s really talked about in the first trimester is “morning sickness” and I think it’s just because someone found a cuter way to say “vomiting daily”. Luckily I didn’t experience that but I did deal with:
- Sore boobs – so sore. I’m a tummy sleeper and at first it was so bad I couldn’t lay on my stomach. It hurt. Oh, and I immediately outgrew all but 1 of my bras. I thought this would happen until way later.
- Weird bowel things – like major constipation. (I know, gross and TMI but you were warned). The only reason I want to talk about this publicly is because I really feel like no one mentions this, and it probably continues to be a really noticeable symptom.
- Fatigue – so. Tired. All. The. Time. I napped, I went to bed early, and I was still tired. Again, this is just something I thought wouldn’t happen until you were really pregnant. No, right away.
- Hormones – I was not generally a crier. That’s changed. Cute commercial? Tears
- Crazy Pregnancy Dreams – I didn’t know this was A Thing at all, and I do know it’s totally not something everyone experiences. But I have had crazy, vivid, nonsensical dreams very often since I’ve been pregnant. It’s kind of neat but also really strange.
Telling people was also interesting. We didn’t wait long to tell our immediate family. It was such a hard secret to keep! We were very lucky to hear a heartbeat quite early on which is a great sign and made me feel a little bit more comfortable telling people. Plus, I knew if I did miscarry I would want the support of my family and close friends.
But then when you tell people there are questions that get asked almost immediately. Sometimes I just wonder if they are “knee-jerk” questions – like asking if we have names picked out. Also a surprising number of people have asked me if it was planned. Which, like, if you know me at all seems like a very obvious YES , (I think), but besides that I’m not totally sure why that matters. How do you answer that if it wasn’t on purpose? Is this a reflection on me? (You couldn’t have possibly done this on purpose right?)
Going into my second trimester I’m trying to tell myself to not worry about weight as long as I’m eating well and to go easy on myself. I also tried to tell myself that I would not worry about it when my belly got to looking pudgy-but-not-cute. I’m there and it’s actually harder than I thought it would be to keep that mindset. So going forward I’m going to try to keep reminding myself that while I might just look fat, that’s not what it is.